Gardening because murder is wrong | Retro Mushroom Art Cozy Sweater

Sometimes the only thing between you and a prison sentence is a bag of mulch. This isn't a "quietly bold" sweater; it’s a medium-heavy knit warning to the public. Featuring the retro mushroom and gem illustration with the slogan "Gardening because murdering is wrong," it’s the ultimate uniform for the gardener who’s one bad interaction away from the edge.

Because it’s garment-dyed, it has that faded, lived-in texture that says you actually do work in your garden. The ribbed collar and cuffs are reinforced to hold their shape while you’re hauling soil or hiding bodies—metaphorically speaking. It’s soft, it’s heavy, and it’s built to survive every season of your life.

Product features
- 80% ring-spun cotton / 20% polyester medium-heavy fabric (9.5 oz) for softness with structure
- Relaxed fit with 1x1 ribbed collar, cuffs and bottom hem that retain shape
- Twill neck tape and half-moon back patch for durability and comfort
- OEKO-TEX certified low-impact dyes and sewn-in twill label
- Embroidery-ready left-chest and center-chest areas for personalization

Care instructions
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Do not dryclean